Saturday, September 03, 2005

what to do with the toothbrush?


(Some of this post pertains to an inside joke, so I will fill you in: there is a cable television network called Trio. They play random programs and a lot of it refers to pop culture. Every once in a while they play a documentary entitled "Texas Teen Virgins." No, this is not a porn film, it is review of the Texas policy of teaching only abstinence in school and other people who are encouraging kids to remain chaste. There was one minister who compared virginity to a toothbrush in a box and how when a person has sex it is like they have become a used toothbrush (ick). A person is able to claim a second virginity by putting the toothbrush back in the box. Jenny and I decided that there must be a St. Toothbrush and this is how that phrase came about.)

I am on a man sabbatical.

I have been on said sabbatical since late April. I declared the summer of 2005 drama free and that meant avoiding entanglements with guys. Apparently my plan is starting to backfire. Jenny and I hang out a lot. We always joke that it would be easier if we were lesbians, but unfortunately, we're attracted to men. Oh well. Several people have interpreted our hanging out a lot to us being gay. Well, namely me. Last week at the race, I was wearing a camo NAPA hat and apparently this is the international gay bat signal. Great. Last night I was at Jenny's new apartment and one of the people doing construction on the apartment above her asked me to tell Jenny something and said "aren't you Jenny's sister?" I told him no and he said "Well, are you Jenny's (hand motion from side to side) you know?" I said "I'm her friend." Good Lord. Apparently I have moved from the sabbatical to the front row of a Melissa Etheridge concert. The toothbrush needs to get out of the box. I'm starting to feel like this. Nothing rash, but maybe I need to reenter the romance department. Hmmm. Anyone have suggestions? Toothbrush in box or somewhat out?

7 comments:

Humour and last laugh said...

interesting blog!

Anonymous said...

pray tell, what is a "gay bat"? as your "you know" friend, i would agree that a little man time is in order. don't forget, though, you may get confused for being a lesbian, but every man i come into contact with thinks i'm a big o'le ho, which is not too flattering either. so, be careful with who you let use your toothbrush...ha ha.

Peyton said...

Bring that toothbrush out... everyone deserves a little "play".

Unknown said...

I say take the opportunities as they come....

Lora Leigh said...

If you see a toothbrush you like -- brush your teeth with it and see what you think...

Anonymous said...

What with his well-known relationship with Robin, isn't "gay Batsignal" redundant?

Anonymous said...

girl, my puppies just ate my camo napa hat this morning- no idea where to get another one - please help a sista out!
tami - tmemrsn@hotmail.com