Sunday, August 28, 2005

a little red on the neck, but otherwise fine...

Bristol was awesome! This is the first time I have been to a track other than Talladega and it was an overall fun time. Jenny and I had an interesting experience in one of the campgrounds on Friday night and suffice it to say that we were hit on by some very unattractive people. I can take comfort in the numerous compliments I received including, but not limited to, "nice teeth" "pretty face" "great rack" (and my personal favorite) "you know, I'm not the settlin' down type, but I could be with you for a good ten years." Needless to say my confidence level is through the roof. I think it is impossible to feel bad about yourself at a NASCAR race b/c you see such a variety of people such as:

classic redneck: (male) mullet, shirtless (if wearing a shirt, something from a hunting or racing variety or something describing their prowess with the ladies), denim shorts, hat with their driver number, 16 o.z. + beer w/ coozy, farmer's tan, cigarette,
(female) crinkly permed hair, dyed blonde with at least an inch of roots, Dale Jr. or Jeff Gordon tank top (a bit too tight, but ready for flashing), denim shorts, swarthy complexion from sun.

New to NASCAR fan: (male or female) shoes that are inappropriate for walking in mud (well, you hope its mud) i.e., high heels, loafers; a spankin' new driver shirt, bottled water, general look of confusion and/or awe/disgust at the general festivities.

Future groupies: this strictly female variety of race fan has enough makeup to supply a fleet of saturday night hookers (approximately), hair in a cute ponytail, mini skirt, ample cleavage in a tight driver shirt (usually someone like Dale Jr) and a general look that says something like "I will do anything or anyone to get my claws into __________(fill in with whatever driver)."

These are just a few examples of the people one will encounter at a typical race. Who's up for the next one?


jenny said...

i am curious as to what group we would fall into.

Lora Leigh said...

That is one of the best compliments I've heard. Well, aren't you the new poster girl for Mrs. Right (for a good 10 years)! ahhaha.

Peyton said...

please note that the classic redneck male must have the sleeves cut off of the t-shirt... Prrrrr, so sexy... (only kidding)