If sex could walk and talk...and sing

It would look like Robin Thicke

It's tomorrow!

My big day (night) at work is tomorrow and I am pretty nervous. I have truly given up on a decent night's sleep and have surrendered to the fact that I am just too keyed up to relax. Wish me luck!

The compliment every girl waits to hear

At the grocery store the clerk asked me to show i.d. for my adult beverage purchase. The following is our charming exchange:

Store Clerk: May I see your license?
Me: Sure
SC: (upon inspecting said identification) Wow, you must be doing something right!
Me: Well, thank you (in that ducking-the-head kind of bashfulness)
SC: (after looking at license again) You don't look THAT old!

Really? THAT old? How old is that? I am 28. He acts like I just got out of my crypt and dragged myself over to the f*cking Winn-Dixie for a draught of ale. Damn. What a terrible way to end a compliment.

I don't often do this...

I try to avoid discussing politics because I have complicated feelings about a variety of issues that face us everyday. Today, after pondering the meaning of Memorial Day (which is tomorrow) I just have to be clear about a couple of things.

I believe that any person who has already, is currently, or will in the future serve in Iraq or another area that the government has deemed a threat should be profusely thanked. I would not want to go and I don't have the courage.

With that said, I do not support this war. I believe that we are only alienating more people and we are in a quagmire. Although 'quagmire' is a word that was often associated with Vietnam, I believe it is an apt description here. I am not one of those uneducated people that draws parallels between the conflict without any basis. My years studying Vietnam while in graduate school have given me enough insight to believe that there are similarities. No, they are not the same conflict, but I believe that the end will be the same:

We will continue to fight this fight because our leaders tell us we will 'win' and that 'failure is not an option,' but we will eventually withdraw from Iraq without a true conclusion. Perhaps we will leave this war to the Iraqis to fight and after they are not propped up by American troops, the country will fall into mass chaos with the Sunnis and Shi'tes scrabbling to gain the most power or some other far more extreme fringe group will seize control. We have aided in destroying much of the infrastructure of Iraq and it will take decades to rebuild. The resentment and negative public opinion felt towards the United States may be irreparable.

I won't mention this topic again. I just felt that I had to express my feelings. You may not agree with me (my father, brother and many other people don't), but I think it is important to have thoughtful discussions about the hard topics.


Happy Memorial Day and thanks to all of our armed forces here and abroad.

Just a note

Do not rent, buy or even acknowledge the presence of the movie Because I Said So. It is a truly terrible movie of epic proportions. You're welcome.

I've gone legit (also included - observations from the day)

My tags expired in February. I just put the new ones on today. It will be nice not having to look out for cops while driving. I have to admit having expired tags has made me a better driver.

I was driving behind a man today who deliberately ran over a squirrel. It was a startling act of cruelty.

I was on perezhilton.com and he had a clip from the Lisa 'left eye' Lopes's documentary, which includes the very moments before her death (I mean seconds). Someone is filming in the car and the video stops as the car is swerving. It is a strange feeling to seeing the moments before a person's death.

Work is going well and I believe that Summer Reading may not kill me after all. Maybe

Harder than I thought

I went home this weekend and saw Murphy for the first time in two months. I would not have imagined that such a short amount of time could produce such startlingly drastic changes. Murphy is much thinner and just quietly wanders around the house. He doesn't run to the door and bark anymore (which was one of his favorite activities). I remember all of the times that I yelled at him to shut up and now I just wish he would show some of his old spark. Getting old and sick is so sad. I just cried and cried after I picked him up and snuggled him. I don't think he will be around for the next time I am home (which is for my brother's wedding in four weeks). I'm going to take some pictures and post them online. He's not just a dog to me.

To Sleep...perchance to not feel like crap

I have always had trouble getting to sleep. I am not one of those people that just hits the pillow and is off to dream land. I lay in the bed, night after night, for an interminable amount of time. Most everyone I know just pleasantly drifts off, but not me. I think about the things that happened during the day and I worry about stuff that is coming up at work. It doesn't really matter, I can always come up with something to fret about. I alternate between four hours of sleep and 10 hours. I'll have several bad nights and then crash on some of the other days. I need to figure out how to get a restful night - every night. I'll take suggestions...

Time marches on...

Several months ago I posted about my Dad's dog, Murphy and his diagnosis of cancer. At first, it was easy to put it out of my mind and pretend that nothing was wrong with him. Unfortunately, my brother called on Saturday and told me that Murphy is blind. The vet says that the cancer has spread enough that it is compromising his optic nerve. It is undeniable proof that the cancer is moving rapidly. This poor, sweet, dog has lost his vision and I can't imagine how distressing it must be to him. No one can explain what is going on to him and I just want to hug him and carry him around the house so he doesn't have to be afraid. Dad says he stays really close to him in the bed - probably because he is unsure about where the edges are. He has also been bumping around the house trying to find his way. I am heading home this weekend and I know it will be quite upsetting. I don't think I am really ready to let go of the last tangible connection to my mom.

oh no

I am posting it here:

I put a profile up on Match.com (thanks for the encouragement, Sarah M.). I am putting it here so that I can't pretend I didn't do it. I will let you know what I find out. I tried to be really honest, so I imagine my matches will be...limited...

Heard tonight

I feel like a winner...

Tonight, I drove through an ice cream place close to my apartment after dinner. Jenny was in the car with me and the lovely guy at the window remarked that there must be a lot of girls breaking up with their boyfriends. He then went on to philosophically note that "like twenty females have gotten ice cream tonight. On a Friday night. Did your boyfriend break up with you?"

um. No. Thanks for asking.

pity party

I'm not feeling too popular these days. I am a self-admitted homebody, but I do like to go out and hang with friends. Lately, I feel like I'm just not too much fun anymore. I mean, I guess that's the truth as people don't seem to want to ask me to do stuff. I guess I better get to like being a homebody even more.

My Biggest Pet Peeve

Number 1. Nothing tops it.

Drunk Driving. Particularly Celebrity Drunk Driving. These people get their asses hauled all over Hollywood, but can't seem to find a driver when they're inebriated.

Lane Garrison (drunk and high - killed a high school student)
Ty Pennington
Paris Hilton
Nicole Richie (high on Lortabs and Pot)
Eve
Michelle Rodriquez
Tracy Morgan
Rip Torn (there is also a ridiculous video of his arrest on YouTube)
Mike Tyson (high on coke)
Jessica Smith (desperate chick on Laguna Beach)
Mel Gibson
David Hasselhoff (I know this comes as a shock after that crazy video)
Vivica A. Fox
Al Unser Jr. (indy driver)
A.J. Foyt (indy driver)
Gary Chapman (Christian singer)
Trey Anastasio (Phish)
Ray Liotta
Nick Carter
Gus Van Sant
George Michael
Haley Joel Osment
Taboo (Black Eyed Peas)
Brian Bonsall (little kid on Family Ties)
Cynthia Watros (Lost)
Tracey Gold
Zachery Ty Bryan (Home Improvement)
Glen Campbell
Wynonna Judd
Billie Joe Armstrong
Nick Nolte
Kim Delaney
Natasha Lyonne
Shannen Doherty
Andy Dick (drugs)
Jason Priestley


To name a few.

8/8/02

This was the date that Claire and I made a list of what we wanted to accomplish by the time we were 30. I am 28 and it has been almost 5 years since this list. There were fifteen items that I wanted to do. As of today, I have only managed to complete 7 of these goals. Some of them I am quite proud of, such as: having my Master's in History (I did not know that I was going to get a Master's in Library Science - so maybe I should count that as two?), having a job, and being close to my godchild. Unfortunately, I have failed to maintain my weight, have a significant relationship, and exercise three times a week (which is tied with maintaining my weight). I think I should set out on a new path to try and accomplish some of these goals.

I encourage everyone to make a list like this. It has been an interesting piece of paper to check periodically. You might want to set a different age goal, but I think it's something that I am glad I did.

The magic of photography???

Over the past several weeks I have had the 'pleasure' of seeing lots of pictures of myself. Yeah. Well, I could have lived for many more years without seeing this stuff. I love looking at pictures. Just not with me in them. It's really a Catch-22 because I want to be in the pictures, but just looking different. I generally try to avoid cameras at all costs. ALL COSTS. I haven't been happy with how I look in years. All these photos just help bring that home. Sadly enough...I just don't seem to want to do anything about it. Sh*t.

A Question of Loyalty and Elvis

Two topics today, folks.

First: I like to think of myself as a loyal person. One that feels the hurt of other people and tries to support them when they've been wronged. How far does this go? This week, I've offered to never go back to one of my favorite restaurants. That's a big deal for me, but it is still a matter of being loyal. If I think there is a legitimate reason for how a friend feels about a certain person, place, or thing...I try to support them. Just a note.

Second: I am finishing up the second volume of an Elvis biography that I have been working on reading for the last several months. The total page count is a little under 1200 pages, but I am a fan and I want to know as much about The King as possible. It's a great read, but a little disillusioning. The author, Peter Guralnick, really explores EVERY aspect of his life and a lot of it is quite depressing. I knew he was a philanderer and super strung out on drugs, but it was much worse. And so very sad. I think I'm a little obsessed as this is my fifth Elvis bio in the last four months...and I have another one waiting in the wings. I will totally kick ass at my Elvis trivia game that I own and intend on making people play.