Let me introduce you to...

Teddy G. - otherwise known as Mr. C*ckblocker. T.G. has been known to sit directly between an amorous couple to make sure nothing naughty happens. It seems he has a sensor for anyone having romantic inclinations. Luckily, as these things haven't happened to me since Moses parted the Red Sea - I haven't had to suffer such a terrible distraction. I mention this because the roomie was getting a little PG-13 loving on our couch and Mr. C*ckblocker came in for the kill. He hopped on the back of the gentleman caller and waited to be included in the action. Needless to say, he got left in the den while the couple moved onto the boudoir. I could tell Teddy was a little depressed when I got home...